Tips for Darklords

Books, movies, television and everything else
Post Reply
User avatar
Undead Cabbage
Evil Genius
Evil Genius
Posts: 623
Joined: Wed Oct 19, 2005 7:39 pm
Location: In one of Neil Gaiman's books, or at least I wish I was.
Contact:

Tips for Darklords

Post by Undead Cabbage »

If I were an Overlord List

To see the list, just scroll down a bit. I don't think there is a single Darklord that doesn't fail at least one of these.

Except, of course, Azalin. But then again, his doomsday devices could have been labelled 'do not touch' as well.
User avatar
Gemathustra
Evil Genius
Evil Genius
Posts: 578
Joined: Wed Dec 10, 2003 11:31 pm
Location: The Cleft of Dimensions

Post by Gemathustra »

I don't know...
I always got the gross suspicion that to follow that list explicitely would take absolutely all of the fun out of being a melodramatic villain.
I'd sooner floss my teeth with Scs' intestines again than give up laughing maniacally.
Or turning into a giant snake.
"Arrogant mortal! You are in my world now and you will never leave this attic alive! I will destroy you, and then I will possess she whom you love the most. And there is not a single thing in the world you can do to stop me!"
*poke*
"OW!"
-Dracula
User avatar
ScS of the Fraternity
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 2409
Joined: Fri Nov 28, 2003 10:46 pm
Location: Toronto
Contact:

Post by ScS of the Fraternity »

Tip #554: Cultivate friendship with a species of viscious malaysian intestinal worms. That way, if captured you can vomit them out to attack your captors.
Also discourages people from flossing with your entrails - the second time, anyway.
Evil Reigns!!!!
User avatar
Gemathustra
Evil Genius
Evil Genius
Posts: 578
Joined: Wed Dec 10, 2003 11:31 pm
Location: The Cleft of Dimensions

Post by Gemathustra »

ScS of the Fraternity wrote:Tip #554: Cultivate friendship with a species of viscious malaysian intestinal worms. That way, if captured you can vomit them out to attack your captors.
Also discourages people from flossing with your entrails - the second time, anyway.
On the other hand, malaysian intestinal worms go great with tom kha soup.
"Arrogant mortal! You are in my world now and you will never leave this attic alive! I will destroy you, and then I will possess she whom you love the most. And there is not a single thing in the world you can do to stop me!"
*poke*
"OW!"
-Dracula
User avatar
JinnTolser
Evil Genius
Evil Genius
Posts: 523
Joined: Wed Dec 03, 2003 10:43 am
Location: Franklin Park, IL

Post by JinnTolser »

My favorite on the list was this one:
If one of my daughters actually manages to win the hero and openly defies me, I will congratulate her on her choice, declare a national holiday to celebrate the wedding, and proclaim the hero my heir. This will probably be enough to break up the relationship. If not, at least I am assured that no hero will attack my Legions of Terror when they are holding a parade in his honor.
Post Reply