RL Smurfs

[tec-goblin]

Well, the text is almost complete. Some sections need some work and two sections are still not written. (Forest and Lifestyle) I would be very happy if a native speaker corrected my mistakes and the made it a bit more elaborate... And someone has to write the introductory story.

I have a version with images - contact me to send it to you, or go to
http://www.sff.gr/forums/index.php?s=f3 ... st&p=29599
to download the doc

Now... let's start with the new sections:

The Smurfland
Dirty Little Secrets

Writing: tec-goblin
Additional writing: Manofevil
Editors: tec-goblin
Playtesters: Atrelegis, Dimi, Luthien, tec-goblin, Viky
Thanks to: Cure, Desdichado, Igor the Henchman, Rikochet, www.smurf.com


Out of the Blue 1
History 1
Smurfs in General 2
Appearance 2
Language 3
Lifestyle & Education 3
The Smurf Hero 3
The Forest 4
DM’s Appendix 5
Involving the Players 5
New Equipment 6
New Spells 7
Who’s Smurfed 7
Papa Smurf 7
Jokey 9
Smurfette 10
Other Smurfs 11
Gargamel & Azrael 15

History
Smurfs have a great selection of folk tales and stories on past adventures. Papa Smurf and Grandpa Smurf remember their past adventures, and share their knowledge with the other Smurfs.
It wouldn’t be unexpected to reach the conclusion that Smurfs have great knowledge on their history, due to their extremely long lifespan and the fact that Grandpa is still around, sharing stories. This is quite far from the reality, though. The first hints to a Smurf Village in the notes of an alchemist in Nartok date back to 716 BC, a fact which indicates that Smurf village is probably not so old as some might believe. This pushes many of Papa’s and Grandpa’s stories into the realm of false history.
As if this wasn’t enough, the tales are told in a haphazard way and sometimes they are slightly changed in order to lead to some “morals”. This greatly confuses young Smurfs, making them incapable of finding the patterns behind events and the hidden links that can turn a series of tales to real history.
Anyway, little is known on the period before Papa Smurf became a Papa. We don’t know how Grandpa Smurf left his position as a senior member, nor if there were other Smurfs in this generation. There are tales, though, on the period Smurfs were young – how they were brought to the village by a stork, their first steps, how Papa Smurf taught them to be happy and peaceful etc. Even these stories, though, are remembered only through the words of Papa Smurf – Smurfs remember quite a few things regarding their childhood. What they do remember, though, is that these were peaceful times, without the threat of Gargamel.
Stories on the last 50 years of Smurf existence are much more detailed though, indicating the passage from false history to reality. The appearance of dreaded Gargamel is probably the seminal event of the creation of Smurf Village. That’s why Smurfs’ recent history is full of strange adventures, spoiling the schemes of Gargamel and much dancing and happiness. There are, though, some events that really affected the Smurf community after the appearance of Gargamel.
At first, it was the creation of Smurfette – one of the first plans of Gargamel against Smurfs was to create a female Smurf to entrap this young pest. As it is described later, this plan failed miserably, with Smurfette being now a great member of the Smurfish family.
Then came the creation of Smurflings – [I don’t remember the story well, PLEASE HELP]
Smurfish population increased with the introduction of Grandpa Smurf who was once Papa Smurf to Papa Smurf. He returned at a crucial time. A magical artifact, the long-life stone, which allows Smurfs their long life spans, was in need of renewal. Every thousand years, this stone must be renewed using the four magical elements, earth, air, fire, and water, or the Smurfs automatically age to death. After many adventures in all corners of their forest, the Smurfs managed to save the artifact.
Village in the Smurf village is currently quite peaceful, but Grandpa Smurf prepares for another big adventure: freeing his own mentor and friend, Nanny Smurf, from a place that appears only once every 500 years.
Castle Captor is the name of this place…

Dread Possibility: Grandpa’s Nemesis
Grampa has an old enemy. A once-handsome wizard named Nemesis who also knows of the long-life stone and wished to use it to become immortal. As he was trying to force Grandpa Smurf, whom he called 'Old Blue', to give up the stone, Grampa managed to counter his spell and Nemesis was changed into 'a hideous creature with horrible hiccups'.
A Smurf travelling through the forest and hearing “HIC! HIC! HIC!” knows that the dreaded Nemesis is close by.
Smurfs that had survived this experience describe Nemesis as a badly hunchbacked individual in a purple hooded cloak. He has glowing red eyes and gnarled fingers like claws. No Smurf can smurf to look at him for more than a few seconds.

The Forest
[to be supplied – I need help here. I don’t have many ideas regarding this]
"is the Great Oak, by which the smurfs especially liked to walk and play. Gargamel used the spot a lot as a setting for his smurf-traps. Near the forest lies the home of Homnibus, the mage, a big friend to Papa Smurf. Otherwise, I seem to remember a river, and a beach coastline nearby, where the smurfs go swimming en masse during hot summer days.[/url]"

" Castle Captor, as her prison was named, was a giant talking moving but fixed edifice that would capture travelers and force them to clean and repair it until they dropped from exhaustion. Travelers approach this place and when they are close enough, huge brick arms reach out and toss them through the front gate. trapping them. Their only possible escape: wait and work 500 years (immortality included with capture) for the castle to appear again and hope to get past the castle many snares to the outside. A very RavenLoft idea, I think. I don't know if you can do anything with those, but I thought I'd share them."


Involving the Players
A group of adventurers or scholars could be easily be trapped into the Smurf village and the surrounding forest. There are various ways for a DM to paint his player’s lives in blue…
• Adventurers to the domain could be polymorphed into smurfs by a potion they find in a mage’s lair or by a small mistake of an alchemist – who could confuse the light blue on the label of cure potions with the deep blue on the label of this “strange potion”. It could be even put into their food by a rival. This could make adventurers small Smurfs, while the Mists gather to get them into a suitable domain. The potion could have a permanent, instantaneous or temporary duration.
• Players could be cursed by a foe (A dying wizard who knows too much? An alchemist who has learned of the failed attempts of Gargamel? A Vistani who feels it would be a suitable punishment for the arrogant Giorgios?) and are led to the Smurf village. They might change to Smurfs immediately or possibly the longer they stay there, their bodies turn small and blue.
• A player or non-player character who causes mayhem by not being careful and behaving in a silly way could be embraced by the Mists, following the Path of Smurf. If he doesn’t change his dangerous ways when he sees the first signs (for example, his nose getting blue or developing a small rounded tail), he might be become a Smurf altogether by the 4th step of this path of corruption. Only a single item or feature reminds of his previous existence.
In case of permanent or instantaneous effects, the players will have to find a means to return to their normal lives. Even if the effects are temporary, the PCs might try to find some antidote anyway, because they’ll probably don’t know it’s temporary. If they have polymorphed to Smurfs, they are probably restricted by the Closed Borders, as any normal Strumf would.
The means to stop being Smurf could be anything, ranging from a simple dispel magic to killing darklord Gargamel himself! Or even something more obscure, like convincing Mather Nature that they do not belong to this place. Learning where Mother Nature lies will probably involve gaining the friendship of other Smurfs, while convincing Mother Nature might involve various strange adventures in the forest.
Players will often avoid behaving like Smurfs, even in a Smurf form. But the “See Everything in Positive Light” ability could be a great tool in the hands of the DM to describe the world in a happy and silly way which could cause happy reactions. It is essential to catch the happy Smurfish mood before stepping onto revealing the dirty little secrets of Ravenloft Smurfs. If the DM thinks that his players won’t ever get into the mood he wants, he might try the following:
• The players are lost in mists (or a portal, if they come from a different world), until they get into a dark and looming forest. Nothing seems extremely strange at start, until they hear the first small blue happy thing singing as if the forest is a paradise…
• The players uncover a book on creating Gold from other matter. Even if they are not interested in wealth, it might be prudent to check the validity of this text – because it could be extremely dangerous in the hands of a villain. Their researches lead them in the depths of an inhospitable forest…


The Great Book of Spells (minor artifact): The item with this quite uninspired title is Gargamel's most prized and secret possession. It’s a talking magic tome Gargamel keeps in a secret cellar.
In fact, it’s a very powerful item, a minor artefact that shadows the power of most magical items in the Land of Mists. It can make true a single wish of its owner once a month, a wish whose duration lasts at maximum for one day (from the sunrise to the sundown).
The use of the book comes with only two painful downsides. Firstly, the book is notoriously vain and egotistical, and demanded to be treated with lordly respect. Before it would accept to use its powers, it will make the beseecher plead with it, and willingly execute humiliating actions for the book's amusement. The typical phrase to wake up the book is a good example of this artifact’s vanity:
O great book of Spells
On whose pages dwell
Secrets no one tells
Awake! For [Gargamel]!
The second downside is, of course, that the book isn't above perverting the plea ever so slightly, ensuring that its gifts always came complete with a nasty surprise for its master.
Strong (Universal); CL 18th; Weight 3 lb.
Dread Possibility:
Azalin’s Gift
This book handwriting might seem familiar to Darkon officials and to the Kargatane. It is written by the hand of Azalin himself. He has created it as a “gift” to promising, yet vain high ranking Kargatane.
The first one who received this book was Xanthus the Omnipresent – a spy who rose into Kargatane’s ranks by knowing everything he could know for practically anyone in the domain.
Anyone except Azalin…
Xanthus liked the security of knowing what’s happening around him, and the thrill of discovering it. It was not suprising that he started getting too close to Azalin’s secrets. Azalin was expecting it… He made sure everyone in Kargatane learned that he rewarded “his best spy”. And soon everyone also learned of Xanthus dying by a psychic poison. The fool has asked the book for a poison capable to kill undead…
The book changed many hands under the observant eyes of Azalin, before it reached the hands of young alchemist Gargamel…


Jokey [UPDATED]
Male Smurf Smart Hero 1/Charismatic Hero 2: CR 3; SZ D(humanoid); HD 3d6; hp 10; Mas 11; Init +3; Spd 20ft; Defense 18, touch 18, flat-footed 15; Base Atk +1; Grapple -15; Atk +1 unarmed melee (1); SA suggestion 1/week (from path of corruption 1); SQ charm (males), red ribbon diet (from path of corruption 1) savant: craft (chemical), See everything in positive light; AL chaos, jokes, Smurfs; SV Fort +2, Ref +5, Will +4; AP 1; Rep+3; Str 2, Dex 16, Con 11, Int 13, Wis 13, Cha 16
Occupation: Creative (class skills: Forgery, Perform (dance, stand up))
Skills and Feats: Bluff +11*, Craft (chemical) +7, Demolitions +5, Diplomacy +10*, Forgery +3, Hide +19, Knowledge (behavioural sciences) +7, Move Silently +7, Perform (dance) +5*, Perform (singing) +5*, Perform (stand-up) +8*, Read/Write Language (Common, Smurf, Sylvan), Repair +4, Sense Motive +4, Speak Language (Common, Elven, Smurf, Sylvan); Stealthy, Iron Will, Run;
Jokey uses his Wealth +7 to creative explosives, including Jokey’s Hillarious Bombs .
*+2 against males. Jokey is used to make pranks against other Smurfs, but he hasn’t much experience in women (there is only one in the village after all).

Oh, who’s this lovely Smurf smurfing you a great smurf in a yellow box? He must be a formidable character indeed. You too eager to open the box…
BANG!

History
Jokey’s past seems a straight line of adventures, jokes and prank-made mayhem. There are secrets, though, no Smurf would expect: secrets regarding the events around his first creation of his signature bombs…
Jokey, as a smurfling smurfed, around with the other smurflings, making fun of Papa Smurf – Jokey was the only stain in Papa’s image of seriousness and knowledge. This went one step too far, when Jokey put a small bug in Papa’s pants, making him jumping around and screaming in a smurfishly funny way.
This was Jokey’s biggest exploit and he was thrilled by the experience. He wanted to test his limits. Then, all of a sudden, he fell on one of Papa’s books, with the magnificent title “The Big Book of Laughs”. This book was full of receipts for dangerous explosive solutions and ingenious pranks– wow, that would make a great show!
Jokey never stopped to think of the reason he found that book so easily – maybe our canny reader will be thinking of complicated plots and paranoid scenarios. The result was him smurfing his first bomb – a bomb he was too eager to test, despite the dangers involved.
And so he did – in one of his lone expeditions to the forest (he was old enough to get away with some sneaking outside of the village), he found a passing knight and gave him the first of the yellow boxes ever created by his hands. The knight thought it was some kind of magical fey gift and opened it…
Oh! That was a surprisingly huge explosion by Smurfish standards. Even a human knight couldn’t stand it without harm. That’s what Jokey thought – and, still blinded and deafened by the burst, he ran off to the village, leaving the injured knight alone in the forest – only the Mists know what happened to the Knight – because the Mists saw everything. And they were intrigued…
Jokey found himself being able to create bombs that could almost convince someone to open them. That was a frightening gift, he thought… He could injure more people with this – and he didn’t want such a thing. That’s why he smurfed on researching harmless bombs – Jokey’s Hillarious Bombs.

Current Sketch
The past is very far away… Jokey has been more careful since. The only thing that reminds him his past error is a nasty little habit he has – when alone, he has to eat one red ribbon each day or suffer from nausea for the rest of the day. No other Smurf has shown any sign of knowing his little secret.
And life smurfes on – Jokey is still messing around with other Smurfs – one of the best moments of his career was the resistance against the short period of Brainy’s dictatorship (it happened when Papa was away – smurf the relevant episode), when Brainy called him “anarchic” and ordered the rest of the Smurfs to hunt him. Sometimes he feels alone, though. Is he the only Smurf bored under Papa’s rule?

Combat
Jokey is not a combatant, but he can be very dangerous in the rare case he gets really annoyed with someone. A Smurf that can smurf into your home, deceive you and plant explosives that can stun you or even damage you (that’s very rare practice for Jokey) is a formidable foe indeed.
In straight combat, Jokey usually distracts the enemy to gain time for other Smurfs and then tries to hide.

Lair
Jokey’s home is full of ribbons, yellow cardboxes and all the materials needed for his bombs. He usually keeps one of his signature bombs around and can also create simple normal explosives (due to the limited PL of the smurf village, halve the damage of all explosives created by Jokey). Jokey usually traps the windows and the door in various harmless but smurfishly inconvenient and humiliating ways.
The Big Book of Laughs still lays somewhere in Jokey’s home. Papa knows it, and has threatened Jokey to take it away from him, but Jokey has promised he would use it again only when in dire need of new jokes. Because whenever he smurfs it, circumstances conspire to make the pranks far more disruptive to everything than would be expected by so simple a prank. This book is cursed…

Smurfette
Female Smurf Charismatic Hero 3: CR 3; SZ D(humanoid); HD 3d6; hp 10; Mas 10; Init +1; Spd 20ft; Defense 16, touch 16, flat-footed 15; Base Atk +1; Grapple -16; Atk +1 unarmed melee (1); SA favour; SQ charm (males), See everything in positive light; AL law, pleasure, Smurfs; SV Fort +2, Ref +3, Will +2; AP 1; Rep+3; Str 1, Dex 12, Con 10, Int 12, Wis 12, Cha 18
Occupation: Celebrity (class skill: Bluff)
Skills and Feats: Bluff +11*, Climb -3, Diplomacy +14*, Gather Information +6*, Hide +14, Knowledge (behavioural sciences) +3, Knowledge (popular culture) +4, Listen +3, Move Silently +4, Perform (dance) +7*, Perform (sex) +10*, Perform (singing) +7*, Read/Write Language (Common, Smurf, Sylvan), Sense Motive +3, Speak Language (Common, Elven, Smurf, Sylvan), Spot +3, Swim -3; Alertness, Athletic, Trustworthy;
Smurfette uses her Wealth +9 to buy copies of the same white dress.
*+3 against males.

Smurfette is the dream of every Smurf. She’s all the female element that Smurfs lack, overpacked in one single individual. Her coquettish manners, long blonde hair and mincing eyelashes have smurfed many a Smurf adventure.

History
Smurfette wasn’t always this usually good hearted creature that is the joy of the village. She was initially created by Gargamel as an alchemical creation, in one of his very few moments of apparent magic power. Her initial plan was to infiltrate the Smurf village and lead the Smurfs into a Gargamel’s ambush.
Of course, even this Gargamel’s plan was doomed to turn against him. Papa Smurf realized the truth about Smurfette and, instead of just harming her, he brought her good side to light. After all, he had centuries to see a female Smurf…
Current Sketch
Smurfette has integrated very well into the Smurfish society. The Smurfs love her the way only someone who has seen only one woman in his life could love her. She tries to make everyone happy, and really enjoys the process. After all, they are all so kind and helpful. She likes being necessary. And all Smurfs love being useful.

Combat
Smurfette does not fight. At all. She will charm her way out of dangerous situations. She has, though, the sense to organize other Smurfs and lead them to safety, but only when this is really needed. Otherwise, she prefers to see them make it through by their own efforts. In that way, they learn things. And they behave so knightly…

Lair
Smurfette has a nice small mushroom house which is distinguished by its nice small garden and the hanging washed dresses. It has nothing else really special. Except from a really comfortable bed.

Other Smurfs

BRAINY – smart 2
Allegiances: law, Papa Smurf, smartness

The only Smurf to take everything seriously. Brainy is a moraliser who believes everything Papa Smurf says is sacred. He has even filled a whole book with “clever words” and “morals” of Papa and himself.
He has smurfed to great lengths to insure that his vision of order is preserved among the Smurfs, but his efforts usually smurf up with him upside down. There was a time, though, that he managed to take control of the village in Papa’s absence. He still bears the hatred towards Jokey for spoiling him this small moment of victory over the chaotic and childish Smurfs…

COOK SMURF – strong 1/ smart 1
Allegiances: cooking, good, Smurfs

You can’t miss him with his tall white hat and apron. And his house is always the source of the delicious smell of hot bread, muffins, pies and sweets. Needles to say, he is a “cordon bleu”. He is among the most good-hearted and helpful Smurfs around, when not busy tasting his delicacies.

GROUCHY– dedicated 2
Allegiances: Baby Smurf, mumbling, Sassette

No matter what anyone says, Grouchy smurfs against it. He grumbles and mumbles and always thinks negative. What is hidden from most Smurfs, though, is that he has a tender heart and loves Sassette and Baby.

LAZY SMURF – charismatic 1
Allegiances: Sleep

Lazy only thinks of sleeping. When he painfully wakes in the morning, he waits for the evening to go back to sleep. He loves his pillow. Lazy’s laziness doesn’t bother the other Smurfs except Brainy who’s always after him, smurfing him each time he dozes off.
It is rumoured that his condition is a result of some sleep spell which went awry… Even if this is true, the origins of the spell are unknown…


HANDY– smart 3
Allegiances: Good, Smurfs, Technology

If anything ever needs fixing, Handy is the man for the job. He is also a creator. The pencil behind his ear is always being used to sketch things like a robot, a train or a machine to smurf rain. His creations sometimes exceed the Progress Level of the Village by far. No scholar knows his secret – he seems too good natured to have been helped by the Mists… Or not?

CLOCKWORK SMURF – strong 1/ smart 1 construct
Allegiances: Handy
Notable: construct traits, dread golem; CR 3; Defense 21; SQ regeneration 5 (fire, acid), spider climb; Str 6, Dex 14, Con -, Int 9, Wis 9, Cha 9;

Clockwork Smurf was smurfed and built by Handy to help him out with domestic work. He is useful to everyone and makes delicious sarsaparilla soup for the whole village. From time to time he leaves the Smurfs but comes back regularly to say hello to his friends and takes this opportunity to have his mechanical insides overhauled.
No Smurf, except from Handy, suspects that only dark powers could give that kind of intellect to Clockwork Smurf. His zeitgeist is the word “sarsaparilla” which makes him go to great lengths to cook some soup. It is unknown if there are other words that trigger other functions… Like smurfing people…

HARMONY – charismatic 1
Allegiances: Music, Smurfs

Harmony has the soul of a great musician, but not the talent. He plays in the philharmonic smurfestra. But the only sounds that come from his cornet are Kwaaak and Pweeet. There is hidden animosity towards him by Smurfs when they want to nap. Or not so hidden sometimes, like in the case of Lazy Smurf.

HEFTY – strong 3
Allegiances: Fitness, Law, Smurfs
Notable: Atk club +9 (d2); Str 6, Dex 14, Con 15; Power Attack

Distinguished by a heart-shaped tattoo on his arm. Hefty is the strongest Smurf in the village. He is a sportsman and has even organised the Olympic Smurfs. One can always depend on him if there is any hard work to be done. His combat abilities make him perhaps the only Smurf who would prefer direct assault against an enemy. He is rarely capable to smurf of a more complicated plan, anyway.

PAINTER SMURF– smart 1/ charismatic 1
Allegiances: Good, Painting, Smurfette

Painter lives only for his craft. Canvas, brushes and colour are the joys of his life. Smurfette is his favourite model. But no normal paint can catch her beauty. Maybe some magical one?

POET SMURF – charismatic 1
Allegiances: Chaos, Poetry

With a quill in one hand and a parchment in the other, Poet spends his days scribbling prose, quatrains and essays. He daydreams so much he doesn’t realise the danger he gets himself into. His dedication to his art is unsurpassable; sometimes the words in his parchment seem to get a life of their own.

VANITY SMURF – charismatic 1
Allegiances: Beauty, Fashion, Smurfs

Mirror in hand, and with a flower in his bonnet, Vanity simply adores himself. He thinks he is the smurfiest Smurf in the village and loves talking fashion with Smurfette. Vanity like this always steers the attention of the Mists…

GRANDPA SMURF – tough 1/charismatic 2
Allegiances: Law, Smurfs, Travelling
Notable: Str 1, Dex 8, Con 8, Int 16, Wis 18, Cha 19;

Back in the village after a five hundred-year leave, Grandpa Smurf is the oldest of all Smurfs. He has not taken Papa’s leading role but his energy and enthusiasm are impressive. Besides wearing a bright yellow cap and pants, Grandpa always smurfs pince-nez glasses.
He’s an avid storyteller and loves to show off some of the souvenirs he has collected during his travels. These travels delve deep into false history, but a clever observant could fill in some pieces of the puzzle that the Smurf existence is.

BABY SMURF – charismatic 1
Allegiances: Good, Innocence, Smurfs
Notable: (due to his young age) Str 1, Dex 13, Con 9, Int 8, Wis 10 Cha 15

On a blue, moonlit night, Baby Smurf was brought to the village by a stork. But where did he come from? No-one knows, but everyone immediately adopted him - even though he breaks the routine of their lives.
He is the only Smurf who was born outside false history. He was too young to remember the events, but some mind-probing could reveal the secrets of the origin of Smurfs.

THE SMURFLINGS
SLOUCHY – tough 1
Allegiances: Apathy

Slouchy is not lazy. He just doesn’t care for anything. If he is asked to do anything, he will. But slowly. He plays mellow sax in the Smurfling band. A person like him would never smurf a nervous breakdown. The next time he reacts too slowly to help some Smurf in danger the Mists might not be so forgetful...

SNAPPY– strong 1
Allegiances: Chaos, Nerves

Snappy lives up to his name by being a ball of energy. He goes absolutely berserk when he doesn’t get his way. He is so impatient and bad-tempered that only Papa Smurf can calm him down.
What Snappy doesn’t know is that he has a strange condition, making his nerves tickle whenever he sees white clothing – that’s why only Papa can smurf him down. We don’t know if Papa suspects the reason of Snappy’s nerves…

SASSETTE – smart 1/charismatic 1
Allegiances: Good, Knowledge, Smurfs

Sassette was created by the Smurflings to keep Smurfette company. She has red pigtails and pink overalls. She is a rough and tumble tomboy who is always asking “Why?” and “How?”. As you can imagine, Smurfette is obviously not really interested in Sassette, who, of course, doesn’t care… The world is so full of other smurfing things. Sassette’s curiosity can bring adventure to the village in a moment’s notice.

Gargamel & Azrael [UPDATED]
Gargamel, Darklord of the Smurfland CR 6
Male human Dedicated Hero 1/Smart Hero 2/Occultist 3
Medium humanoid
Init +0; Senses Listen +4, Spot +4
Languages Common, Draconic, Elven, Smurf
Allegiances Evil, Gold

Defense 14, touch 14, flat-footed 13
hp 46 (6 HD); Massive 18
Resist SR 8, You ‘ll never kill me
Fort +6, Ref +2, Will +4

Speed 30 ft. (6 squares)
Melee unarmed +4 (1d6+1)
Base Atk +2; Grp +7
Atk Options Improved Grapple, Improved Unarmed Strike, Scrolls
Special Incompetence against Smurfs, Smurf to Gold at will
Action Points 3

Abilities Str 12, Dex 13, Con 18, Int 11, Wis 9, Cha 12
Feats AlertnessB, BrawlB, Improved Grapple, Impoved Unarmed Strike, StudiousB, Track
Skills Bluff +4, Craft (alchemy) +6, Decipher Script +6, Forgery +5, Handle Animal +3, Hide +5, Knowledge (arcane lore) +9, Move Silently +5, Research +6, Survival +3, Use Magic Device +5
Occupation criminal: class skills (forgery, hide, move silently)
Special Qualities arcane research (scrolls), savant (decipher script), skill emphasis (bluff)
Wealth +6
Scrolls: 4 1st level: disguise self, grease, sleep, silent image

Hook "I will catch you damned Smurfs."

Azrael – mistreated cat CR 2
Cat Fast Hero 2
Tiny magical beast
Init +2; Senses Listen +4, Spot +4, Low-light vision, Scent
Languages Common, Smurf
Allegiances Gargamel

Defense 19, touch 19, flat-footed 16
hp 9 (2 HD); Massive 10
Resist Evasion
Fort +0, Ref +5, Will +1

Speed 30 ft. (6 squares)
Attack Melee claw +6 (1d2-4)
Full Attack Melee 2 claws +6 (1d2-4) and
Melee bite +1 (1d3-4)
Base Atk +1; Grp -7
Action Points 1

Abilities Str 3, Dex 16, Con 10, Int 8, Wis 12, Cha 9
Feats Alertness, Weapon FinesseB
Skills Balance +11, Climb +7, Escape Artist +5, Intimidate +1, Hide +15*, Jump +11, Move Silently +8, Swim -2, Tumble +5

Hook "Niaaarrr."
*In areas of tall grass or heavy undergrowth, the Hide bonus rises to +8, for a total of +19.

Who smurfs this sinister laughter? Who is this balding guy dressed in black rags and red shoes? Where has his fashion-sense gone? And why is bowing as if his back wasn’t crooked enough? Oh… this ugly guy is hiding to ambush little Smurfs. As if his problems weren’t enough…

History
Gargamel’s past is unknown to all but a few secretive scholars. Had S visited the Smurf village, she would have probably been able to probe his mind for details, but her Master never had Smurfs high in his list of priorities.
Gargamel's mother, when he was a baby, would commonly tell him that she'd take care of him and that when he grew up, he'd become a rich and powerful wizard who would take as good care of his mother. She never did forgive him for failing wizard school. Gargamel, apparently came from a family of wizards which included two shrewish sisters and a very formidable godfather, Balthazar. He was sent to a very fine wizards’ school where he became legendary for his poor abilities. In the lab, he was a menace to himself, his classmates, and his professors. Every instructor dreaded him because his presence in their classrooms was not just disruptive, but dangerous. His classmates detested him not just for his incompetence, but for his family background. They resented the fact that his family had handed him a place in the school where most of them had to earn theirs, especially given his inabilities. His only friend was a little kitten named Azrael.
Gargamel realised that he would never gain respect in that way. There was only one other way: make money. That’s how Gargamel turned to alchemical studies. His goal was the pinnacle of an alchemist’s dreams: metastoiheiosis – turning some material to something other. Actually, it was blunter than this. Gargamel wanted to create gold. He want to get rich and he wanted it now, but he was too much of a coward to do it in a more straightforward way (stealing for example – it wasn’t that his morals were above this – he was just a coward).
Gargamel tried various materials: lead, iron, wood. All this was for nothing. Until he heard some young physicist in his home town telling him one thing: “You cannot create value from nothing, mon ami. That’s why you’ll never succeed. You cannot change things as simple as lead to the most-perfect-of-metals, gold. The only thing that’s more valuable than gold is life. So stop this nonsense”.
Of course Gargamel did not. He had just found his answer! Life! He would turn living things to gold! He started with small lizards, then birds, then cats… all for naught. This wasn’t enough he though. Who sells a lizard for gold? Only human people are sold for gold… Here Gargamel starting hesitating. But no, it was a noble purpose after all! He would find a sick person who was ready to die. Yeah, he would cover him with blue ink to make his condition seem even more severe and convince his family that he should take him to his home to try to save him. That was the best plan he’d ever thought.
And so he did. He found the sick man. He bluffed him out of his home. And then, as he was ready to begin his experiments, mists settled into his home. He found himself into a tower away from all civilization. Only his lab and his miserable cat were with him. The worst part: the only thing that was really complicatedly alive there were some… nasty blue funny things, who called themselves Smurfs…
Current Sketch
Gargamel has turned old trying to catch the Smurfs and turn them to gold. And he feels very very tired. Sometimes he thinks of giving up, stopping this – after all he ends up ridiculed each time. Even his only companion, this strangely intelligent cat-who-just-refuses-to-age gets into his nerves.
But then, he sleeps and the dreams come… Dreams of gold and all the joys gold can buy. And whispers reminding him the words and incantations to turn a smurf to gold…
Combat
Gargamel isn’t particularly courageous, but he will enter combat if hunting this only-good-for-gold-blue-pest. He will use his scrolls and canning plans to gain a strategic advantage and then he will try to grapple Smurfs and put them into his bag to boil them later.
Incompetence against Smurfs (Su): Gargamel suffers -2 penalty in all his rolls against Smurfs. Smufs get a +2 bonus to saves against scrolls, spells and special abilities used by Gargamel. This is a result of his curse as a darklord, so it cannot be negated with an antimagic field or anything similar.
Smurf to gold (Sp): Gargamel can cast the spell Smurf to Gold (see the New Spells section) at will, at a caster level equal to his occultist level. Doing so consumes the normal casting time and spell components as the spell.
You’ll never kill me (Su): Smurfs are too goody-goody to harm Gargamel permanently. Any Smurf performing an action that could directly kill Gargamel (for example any Smurf performing a coup de grace against him) stops in its tracks and doesn’t do it. This is a mind-affecting, compulsion effect.

Lair
We’ve all seen this dilapidated tower at least once in their lives. If you are Smurf chances is that you’d be captured at least once in your life in Gargamel’s lab (or is it a kitchen?). You’ll recognize the orthogonal single-floor building with a narrow good-for-nothing tower, the big (big enough to accommodate for all 101+ smurfs) dirty cauldron and the fact that it’s full of cat hair.

Closing the Borders
Gargamel isn’t interested in keeping anyone near him – he is not a very social person. Of course, he doesn’t want Smurfs to escape his clutch either. That’s why he keeps his borders usually closed, but only regarding to Smurfs. Any Smurf trying to escape the domain finds itself overcome by an irresistible nostalgia for its village and turns back trying to return to the Smurf Village for 1 full hour. This is a mind-affecting, compulsion effect.

[Manofevil]

Sheesh! Man, the more you write, the more I remember! I'll add what I have to what you have.

History
Smurfs have a great selection of folk tales and stories on past adventures. Papa Smurf and Grandpa Smurf remember their past adventures, and share their knowledge with the other Smurfs.
It wouldn’t be unexpected to reach the conclusion that Smurfs have great knowledge on their history, due to their extremely long lifespan and the fact that Grandpa is still around, sharing stories. This is quite far from the reality, though. The first hints to a Smurf Village in the notes of an alchemist in Nartok date back to 716 BC, a fact which indicates that Smurf village is probably not so old as some might believe. This pushes many of Papa’s and Grandpa’s stories into the realm of false history.
As if this wasn’t enough, the tales are told in a haphazard way and sometimes they are slightly changed in order to lead to some “morals”. This greatly confuses young Smurfs, making them incapable of finding the patterns behind events and the hidden links that can turn a series of tales to real history.
Anyway, little is known on the period before Papa Smurf became a Papa. We don’t know how Grandpa Smurf left his position as a senior member, nor if there were other Smurfs in this generation.

Grandpa Smurf left to search out the elemental substances necessary to restore the Longlife stone. A large part of his life has been consumed by this search.

There are tales, though, on the period Smurfs were young – how they were brought to the village by a stork, their first steps, how Papa Smurf taught them to be happy and peaceful etc.

An important sidebar: One of these babies was lost to Papa smurf in a terrible accident. For literally a generation, Papa Smurf lived with this guilt until this smurf was found again. It had been found and raised by a family of squirrels who, over the generations, taught him everything. Wild Smurf, as he is known, is a Tarzan-type character, living in the trees and eating nuts and leaves. He doesn't speak, but chitters like a squirrel. He once tried to live in the village but the lifestyle was too foreign to him and he returned to his life in the trees. He still keeps in touch with the other smurfs, however, and many a smurf in trouble in the forest has gratefully heard a cry of 'SIM-O-WAAAAAH' that announces the arrival of Wild Smurf, usually swinging in on vine.

Even these stories, though, are remembered only through the words of Papa Smurf – Smurfs remember quite a few things regarding their childhood. What they do remember, though, is that these were peaceful times, without the threat of Gargamel.
Stories on the last 50 years of Smurf existence are much more detailed though, indicating the passage from false history to reality. The appearance of dreaded Gargamel is probably the seminal event of the creation of Smurf Village. That’s why Smurfs’ recent history is full of strange adventures, spoiling the schemes of Gargamel and much dancing and happiness. There are, though, some events that really affected the Smurf community after the appearance of Gargamel.
At first, it was the creation of Smurfette – one of the first plans of Gargamel against Smurfs was to create a female Smurf to entrap this young pest. As it is described later, this plan failed miserably, with Smurfette being now a great member of the Smurfish family.
Then came the creation of Smurflings – [I don’t remember the story well, PLEASE HELP]

Gladly. The smurflings were three regular smurfs who were sent by Papa Smurf with a message to Father Time. When they arrived, Father Time was out so they decided to leave the message on the table. Snappy noticed a clock that was running backwards and decided to investigate it much to the chagrin of Natural Smurf. Circumstances caused all three smurfs to fall into the backwards clock and by the time Father Time returned, the magic of the clock had de-aged the smurfs to smurflings. The clock running backwards had been an experiment of Father Time's in manipulating time, but while he found he could travel backwards in time, he had never been able to find a method for moving forwards in time, so he was unable to restore them, and the smurfs suddenly had not just a lady and a baby in the village, but children as well.
Not long afterward, Smurfette grew terribly tired of being the only female in a village full of males. The smurflings, in an attempt to cheer her, stole Gargamel's smurfette making formula so that they could make her a companion. One of the necessary ingredients was a bucketful of a special clay used to give the smurfette substance. Because the smurflings used a smurf-sized bucket instead of a human-sized one, the new smurfette was only TWO apples tall, (a smurfling) and because it was Gargamel's spell, she was just as evil as Smurfette had originally been. She raced through the village playing vicious and cruel pranks on every smurf she encountered, all of whom were stunned stiff to see a little girl smurf among them. Hefty and Painter Smurfs sort of hung her name on her when they discussed what she'd been doing:
Hefty: Did you see that sassy little smurfette?
Painter: Oui! She was indeed a ... Sassette.
Papa Smurf, upon hearing what the smurflings had done, immediately hunted little Sassette down and cast the same spell he'd cast on Smurfette, and thus the population of the smurfs was again increased.
Sassette has a habit of calling Papa Smurf 'Pappy'.

Smurfish population increased with the introduction of Grandpa Smurf who was once Papa Smurf to Papa Smurf. He returned at a crucial time. A magical artifact, the long-life stone, which allows Smurfs their long life spans, was in need of renewal. Every thousand years, this stone must be renewed using the four magical elements, earth, air, fire, and water, or the Smurfs automatically age to death. After many adventures in all corners of their forest, the Smurfs managed to save the artifact.

It was not just their forest but the ENTIRE WORLD they had to search, In this case it would have been the entire core and outlying islands which Grandpa would have spent his long life exporing in search of these particular elements. Using a transport spell provided by their Enchanter friend, Homnibus, a special team of smurfs were able to gather the elements from the places Grandpa had found them while the rest of the smurfs stayed home to find the stone which had been buried beneath the village somewhere.

The Forest
[to be supplied – I need help here. I don’t have many ideas regarding this]
"is the Great Oak, by which the smurfs especially liked to walk and play. Gargamel used the spot a lot as a setting for his smurf-traps. Near the forest lies the home of Homnibus, the mage, a big friend to Papa Smurf. Otherwise, I seem to remember a river, and a beach coastline nearby, where the smurfs go swimming en masse during hot summer days.[/url]"

All of this is true. The river smurf, as it is called, has both a dam and a bridge built on it and maintained by smurfs. The river apparently has so many branches to it that it's not practical to follow the river upstream to the village, or that's just another part of the spell that protects the village. If I were to place this forest anywhere in RavenLoft, I'd put it near or in Tepest and the Shadow Rift because the Fey are out in force. Pixies, Fairies, Imps, Sprites, all different types can be encountered in this forest. The smurfs have a long list of Fey among their non-human friends. They often intercede on behalf oif one-another.

"The Great Book of Spells (minor artifact): The item with this quite uninspired title is Gargamel's most prized and secret possession. It’s a talking magic tome Gargamel keeps in a secret cellar.
In fact, it’s a very powerful item, a minor artefact that shadows the power of most magical items in the Land of Mists. It can make true a single wish of its owner once a month, a wish whose duration lasts at maximum for one day (from the sunrise to the sundown).
The use of the book comes with only two painful downsides. Firstly, the book is notoriously vain and egotistical, and demanded to be treated with lordly respect. Before it would accept to use its powers, it will make the beseecher plead with it, and willingly execute humiliating actions for the book's amusement. The typical phrase to wake up the book is a good example of this artifact’s vanity:
O great book of Spells
On whose pages dwell
Secrets no one tells
Awake! For [Gargamel]!
The second downside is, of course, that the book isn't above perverting the plea ever so slightly, ensuring that its gifts always came complete with a nasty surprise for its master.
Strong (Universal); CL 18th; Weight 3 lb.
Dread Possibility:
Azalin’s Gift
This book handwriting might seem familiar to Darkon officials and to the Kargatane. It is written by the hand of Azalin himself. He has created it as a “gift” to promising, yet vain high ranking Kargatane.
The first one who received this book was Xanthus the Omnipresent – a spy who rose into Kargatane’s ranks by knowing everything he could know for practically anyone in the domain.
Anyone except Azalin…
Xanthus liked the security of knowing what’s happening around him, and the thrill of discovering it. It was not suprising that he started getting too close to Azalin’s secrets. Azalin was expecting it… He made sure everyone in Kargatane learned that he rewarded “his best spy”. And soon everyone also learned of Xanthus dying by a psychic poison. The fool has asked the book for a poison capable to kill undead…
The book changed many hands under the observant eyes of Azalin, before it reached the hands of young alchemist Gargamel…

This is all very well done but there are a few details that should be included. Firstly, The Book insists on being awakened with a rhyming incantation similar to the one Gargamel has to use. It won't function without it. Whether this is just stubbornness or an actual actvation key is unknown. Secondly, The Book is also given to speaking in rhyme, especially when dictating the elements and rituals needed for the spell requested. It's not bound to speak in rhyme, but it tends to.

Jokey [UPDATED]
Male Smurf Smart Hero 1/Charismatic Hero 2: CR 3; SZ D(humanoid); HD 3d6; hp 10; Mas 11; Init +3; Spd 20ft; Defense 18, touch 18, flat-footed 15; Base Atk +1; Grapple -15; Atk +1 unarmed melee (1); SA suggestion 1/week (from path of corruption 1); SQ charm (males), red ribbon diet (from path of corruption 1) savant: craft (chemical), See everything in positive light; AL chaos, jokes, Smurfs; SV Fort +2, Ref +5, Will +4; AP 1; Rep+3; Str 2, Dex 16, Con 11, Int 13, Wis 13, Cha 16
Occupation: Creative (class skills: Forgery, Perform (dance, stand up))
Skills and Feats: Bluff +11*, Craft (chemical) +7, Demolitions +5, Diplomacy +10*, Forgery +3, Hide +19, Knowledge (behavioural sciences) +7, Move Silently +7, Perform (dance) +5*, Perform (singing) +5*, Perform (stand-up) +8*, Read/Write Language (Common, Smurf, Sylvan), Repair +4, Sense Motive +4, Speak Language (Common, Elven, Smurf, Sylvan); Stealthy, Iron Will, Run;
Jokey uses his Wealth +7 to creative explosives, including Jokey’s Hillarious Bombs .
*+2 against males. Jokey is used to make pranks against other Smurfs, but he hasn’t much experience in women (there is only one in the village after all).

Oh, who’s this lovely Smurf smurfing you a great smurf in a yellow box? He must be a formidable character indeed. You too eager to open the box…
BANG!

SURPRISE!!!
Jokey always shrieks out 'Surprise' in orgasmic glee. It's obviously his favorite part of the joke.

History
Jokey’s past seems a straight line of adventures, jokes and prank-made mayhem. There are secrets, though, no Smurf would expect: secrets regarding the events around his first creation of his signature bombs…
Jokey, as a smurfling smurfed, around with the other smurflings, making fun of Papa Smurf – Jokey was the only stain in Papa’s image of seriousness and knowledge. This went one step too far, when Jokey put a small bug in Papa’s pants, making him jumping around and screaming in a smurfishly funny way.
This was Jokey’s biggest exploit and he was thrilled by the experience. He wanted to test his limits. Then, all of a sudden, he fell on one of Papa’s books, with the magnificent title “The Big Book of Laughs”. This book was full of receipts for dangerous explosive solutions and ingenious pranks– wow, that would make a great show!

The only thing I'd change here is that I wouldn't make it one Papa's books. Papa keeps books of learning or magic around. He would have no reason to keep a book of jokes. If he came by one, he'd probably leave it at a library or something. Jokey would more likely find this book in the forest someplace. (Remember, Fey all over the place) Or given the implied curse, perhaps the book found him.

Jokey never stopped to think of the reason he found that book so easily – maybe our canny reader will be thinking of complicated plots and paranoid scenarios. The result was him smurfing his first bomb – a bomb he was too eager to test, despite the dangers involved.
And so he did – in one of his lone expeditions to the forest (he was old enough to get away with some sneaking outside of the village), he found a passing knight and gave him the first of the yellow boxes ever created by his hands. The knight thought it was some kind of magical fey gift and opened it…
Oh! That was a surprisingly huge explosion by Smurfish standards. Even a human knight couldn’t stand it without harm. That’s what Jokey thought – and, still blinded and deafened by the burst, he ran off to the village, leaving the injured knight alone in the forest – only the Mists know what happened to the Knight – because the Mists saw everything. And they were intrigued…
Jokey found himself being able to create bombs that could almost convince someone to open them. That was a frightening gift, he thought… He could injure more people with this – and he didn’t want such a thing. That’s why he smurfed on researching harmless bombs – Jokey’s Hillarious Bombs.

Current Sketch
The past is very far away… Jokey has been more careful since. The only thing that reminds him his past error is a nasty little habit he has – when alone, he has to eat one red ribbon each day or suffer from nausea for the rest of the day. No other Smurf has shown any sign of knowing his little secret.
And life smurfes on – Jokey is still messing around with other Smurfs – one of the best moments of his career was the resistance against the short period of Brainy’s dictatorship (it happened when Papa was away – smurf the relevant episode), when Brainy called him “anarchic” and ordered the rest of the Smurfs to hunt him. Sometimes he feels alone, though. Is he the only Smurf bored under Papa’s rule?

Combat
Jokey is not a combatant, but he can be very dangerous in the rare case he gets really annoyed with someone. A Smurf that can smurf into your home, deceive you and plant explosives that can stun you or even damage you (that’s very rare practice for Jokey) is a formidable foe indeed.
In straight combat, Jokey usually distracts the enemy to gain time for other Smurfs and then tries to hide.

Jokey is also known for setting off his joke boxes to spook the mounts of mounted adversaries

Lair
Jokey’s home is full of ribbons, yellow cardboxes and all the materials needed for his bombs. He usually keeps one of his signature bombs around and can also create simple normal explosives (due to the limited PL of the smurf village, halve the damage of all explosives created by Jokey). Jokey usually traps the windows and the door in various harmless but smurfishly inconvenient and humiliating ways.
The Big Book of Laughs still lays somewhere in Jokey’s home. Papa knows it, and has threatened Jokey to take it away from him, but Jokey has promised he would use it again only when in dire need of new jokes. Because whenever he smurfs it, circumstances conspire to make the pranks far more disruptive to everything than would be expected by so simple a prank. This book is cursed…

Smurfette
Female Smurf Charismatic Hero 3: CR 3; SZ D(humanoid); HD 3d6; hp 10; Mas 10; Init +1; Spd 20ft; Defense 16, touch 16, flat-footed 15; Base Atk +1; Grapple -16; Atk +1 unarmed melee (1); SA favour; SQ charm (males), See everything in positive light; AL law, pleasure, Smurfs; SV Fort +2, Ref +3, Will +2; AP 1; Rep+3; Str 1, Dex 12, Con 10, Int 12, Wis 12, Cha 18
Occupation: Celebrity (class skill: Bluff)
Skills and Feats: Bluff +11*, Climb -3, Diplomacy +14*, Gather Information +6*, Hide +14, Knowledge (behavioural sciences) +3, Knowledge (popular culture) +4, Listen +3, Move Silently +4, Perform (dance) +7*, Perform (sex) +10*, Perform (singing) +7*, Read/Write Language (Common, Smurf, Sylvan), Sense Motive +3, Speak Language (Common, Elven, Smurf, Sylvan), Spot +3, Swim -3; Alertness, Athletic, Trustworthy;
Smurfette uses her Wealth +9 to buy copies of the same white dress.
*+3 against males.

Smurfette is the dream of every Smurf. She’s all the female element that Smurfs lack, overpacked in one single individual. Her coquettish manners, long blonde hair and mincing eyelashes have smurfed many a Smurf adventure.

Smurfette is also known for scolding her adversaries when in confrontation. She's even been known to pop Gargamel in the nose when he pushes his face too close to taunt her.

History
Smurfette wasn’t always this usually good hearted creature that is the joy of the village. She was initially created by Gargamel as an alchemical creation, in one of his very few moments of apparent magic power. Her initial plan was to infiltrate the Smurf village and lead the Smurfs into a Gargamel’s ambush.
Of course, even this Gargamel’s plan was doomed to turn against him. Papa Smurf realized the truth about Smurfette and, instead of just harming her, he brought her good side to light. After all, he had centuries to see a female Smurf…
Current Sketch
Smurfette has integrated very well into the Smurfish society. The Smurfs love her the way only someone who has seen only one woman in his life could love her. She tries to make everyone happy, and really enjoys the process. After all, they are all so kind and helpful. She likes being necessary. And all Smurfs love being useful.

Combat
Smurfette does not fight. At all. She will charm her way out of dangerous situations. She has, though, the sense to organize other Smurfs and lead them to safety, but only when this is really needed. Otherwise, she prefers to see them make it through by their own efforts. In that way, they learn things. And they behave so knightly…

Lair
Smurfette has a nice small mushroom house which is distinguished by its nice small garden and the hanging washed dresses. It has nothing else really special. Except from a really comfortable bed.

Other Smurfs

BRAINY – smart 2
Allegiances: law, Papa Smurf, smartness

The only Smurf to take everything seriously. Brainy is a moraliser who believes everything Papa Smurf says is sacred. He has even filled a whole book with “clever words” and “morals” of Papa and himself.
He has smurfed to great lengths to insure that his vision of order is preserved among the Smurfs, but his efforts usually smurf up with him upside down. There was a time, though, that he managed to take control of the village in Papa’s absence. He still bears the hatred towards Jokey for spoiling him this small moment of victory over the chaotic and childish Smurfs…

COOK SMURF – strong 1/ smart 1
Allegiances: cooking, good, Smurfs

You can’t miss him with his tall white hat and apron. And his house is always the source of the delicious smell of hot bread, muffins, pies and sweets. Needles to say, he is a “cordon bleu”. He is among the most good-hearted and helpful Smurfs around, when not busy tasting his delicacies.

Um.. Was it going to be Cook or Greedy here?

...
HANDY– smart 3
Allegiances: Good, Smurfs, Technology

If anything ever needs fixing, Handy is the man for the job. He is also a creator. The pencil behind his ear is always being used to sketch things like a robot, a train or a machine to smurf rain. His creations sometimes exceed the Progress Level of the Village by far. No scholar knows his secret – he seems too good natured to have been helped by the Mists… Or not?

CLOCKWORK SMURF – strong 1/ smart 1 construct
Allegiances: Handy
Notable: construct traits, dread golem; CR 3; Defense 21; SQ regeneration 5 (fire, acid), spider climb; Str 6, Dex 14, Con -, Int 9, Wis 9, Cha 9;

Clockwork Smurf was smurfed and built by Handy to help him out with domestic work. He is useful to everyone and makes delicious sarsaparilla soup for the whole village. From time to time he leaves the Smurfs but comes back regularly to say hello to his friends and takes this opportunity to have his mechanical insides overhauled.
No Smurf, except from Handy, suspects that only dark powers could give that kind of intellect to Clockwork Smurf. His zeitgeist is the word “sarsaparilla” which makes him go to great lengths to cook some soup. It is unknown if there are other words that trigger other functions… Like smurfing people…

Later Handy created a female companion for for Clockwork Smurf, Clockwork Smurfette. To Handy, The clockworks are his children. he feels as a father toward both of them and will defend and nurture them accordingly.

...
HEFTY – strong 3
Allegiances: Fitness, Law, Smurfs
Notable: Atk club +9 (d2); Str 6, Dex 14, Con 15; Power Attack

Distinguished by a heart-shaped tattoo on his arm. Hefty is the strongest Smurf in the village. He is a sportsman and has even organised the Olympic Smurfs. One can always depend on him if there is any hard work to be done. His combat abilities make him perhaps the only Smurf who would prefer direct assault against an enemy. He is rarely capable to smurf of a more complicated plan, anyway.

Hefty also has a deep and abiding fear of heights stemming from a time the smurfs decided to try their hand at putting on a circus and he tried the trapeze. It still rears its ugly head when he is confronted with heights.

...

Gargamel & Azrael [UPDATED]
Gargamel, Darklord of the Smurfland CR 6
Male human Dedicated Hero 1/Smart Hero 2/Occultist 3
Medium humanoid
Init +0; Senses Listen +4, Spot +4
Languages Common, Draconic, Elven, Smurf
Allegiances Evil, Gold

Defense 14, touch 14, flat-footed 13
hp 46 (6 HD); Massive 18
Resist SR 8, You ‘ll never kill me
Fort +6, Ref +2, Will +4

Speed 30 ft. (6 squares)
Melee unarmed +4 (1d6+1)
Base Atk +2; Grp +7
Atk Options Improved Grapple, Improved Unarmed Strike, Scrolls
Special Incompetence against Smurfs, Smurf to Gold at will
Action Points 3

Abilities Str 12, Dex 13, Con 18, Int 11, Wis 9, Cha 12
Feats AlertnessB, BrawlB, Improved Grapple, Impoved Unarmed Strike, StudiousB, Track
Skills Bluff +4, Craft (alchemy) +6, Decipher Script +6, Forgery +5, Handle Animal +3, Hide +5, Knowledge (arcane lore) +9, Move Silently +5, Research +6, Survival +3, Use Magic Device +5
Occupation criminal: class skills (forgery, hide, move silently)
Special Qualities arcane research (scrolls), savant (decipher script), skill emphasis (bluff)
Wealth +6
Scrolls: 4 1st level: disguise self, grease, sleep, silent image

Hook "I will catch you damned Smurfs."

Gargamel also has some ability as a performer. He can play a pipe organ and is given to singing and even dancing. He has a demonstrated inability on the flute however

Azrael – mistreated cat CR 2
Cat Fast Hero 2
Tiny magical beast
Init +2; Senses Listen +4, Spot +4, Low-light vision, Scent
Languages Common, Smurf
Allegiances Gargamel

Defense 19, touch 19, flat-footed 16
hp 9 (2 HD); Massive 10
Resist Evasion
Fort +0, Ref +5, Will +1

Speed 30 ft. (6 squares)
Attack Melee claw +6 (1d2-4)
Full Attack Melee 2 claws +6 (1d2-4) and
Melee bite +1 (1d3-4)
Base Atk +1; Grp -7
Action Points 1

Abilities Str 3, Dex 16, Con 10, Int 8, Wis 12, Cha 9
Feats Alertness, Weapon FinesseB
Skills Balance +11, Climb +7, Escape Artist +5, Intimidate +1, Hide +15*, Jump +11, Move Silently +8, Swim -2, Tumble +5

Hook "Niaaarrr."
*In areas of tall grass or heavy undergrowth, the Hide bonus rises to +8, for a total of +19.

Who smurfs this sinister laughter? Who is this balding guy dressed in black rags and red shoes? Where has his fashion-sense gone? And why is bowing as if his back wasn’t crooked enough? Oh… this ugly guy is hiding to ambush little Smurfs. As if his problems weren’t enough…

History
Gargamel’s past is unknown to all but a few secretive scholars. Had S visited the Smurf village, she would have probably been able to probe his mind for details, but her Master never had Smurfs high in his list of priorities.
Gargamel's mother, when he was a baby, would commonly tell him that she'd take care of him and that when he grew up, he'd become a rich and powerful wizard who would take as good care of his mother. She never did forgive him for failing wizard school. Gargamel, apparently came from a family of wizards which included two shrewish sisters and a very formidable godfather, Balthazar. He was sent to a very fine wizards’ school where he became legendary for his poor abilities. In the lab, he was a menace to himself, his classmates, and his professors. Every instructor dreaded him because his presence in their classrooms was not just disruptive, but dangerous. His classmates detested him not just for his incompetence, but for his family background. They resented the fact that his family had handed him a place in the school where most of them had to earn theirs, especially given his inabilities. His only friend was a little kitten named Azrael.
Gargamel realised that he would never gain respect in that way. There was only one other way: make money. That’s how Gargamel turned to alchemical studies. His goal was the pinnacle of an alchemist’s dreams: metastoiheiosis – turning some material to something other. Actually, it was blunter than this. Gargamel wanted to create gold. He want to get rich and he wanted it now, but he was too much of a coward to do it in a more straightforward way (stealing for example – it wasn’t that his morals were above this – he was just a coward).
Gargamel tried various materials: lead, iron, wood. All this was for nothing. Until he heard some young physicist in his home town telling him one thing: “You cannot create value from nothing, mon ami. That’s why you’ll never succeed. You cannot change things as simple as lead to the most-perfect-of-metals, gold. The only thing that’s more valuable than gold is life. So stop this nonsense”.
Of course Gargamel did not. He had just found his answer! Life! He would turn living things to gold! He started with small lizards, then birds, then cats… all for naught. This wasn’t enough he though. Who sells a lizard for gold? Only human people are sold for gold… Here Gargamel starting hesitating. But no, it was a noble purpose after all! He would find a sick person who was ready to die. Yeah, he would cover him with blue ink to make his condition seem even more severe and convince his family that he should take him to his home to try to save him. That was the best plan he’d ever thought.
And so he did. He found the sick man. He bluffed him out of his home. And then, as he was ready to begin his experiments, mists settled into his home. He found himself into a tower away from all civilization. Only his lab and his miserable cat were with him. The worst part: the only thing that was really complicatedly alive there were some… nasty blue funny things, who called themselves Smurfs…
Current Sketch
Gargamel has turned old trying to catch the Smurfs and turn them to gold. And he feels very very tired. Sometimes he thinks of giving up, stopping this – after all he ends up ridiculed each time. Even his only companion, this strangely intelligent cat-who-just-refuses-to-age gets into his nerves.
But then, he sleeps and the dreams come… Dreams of gold and all the joys gold can buy. And whispers reminding him the words and incantations to turn a smurf to gold… .

Gargamel is also given to talking in his sleep.

Combat
Gargamel isn’t particularly courageous, but he will enter combat if hunting this only-good-for-gold-blue-pest. He will use his scrolls and canning plans to gain a strategic advantage and then he will try to grapple Smurfs and put them into his bag to boil them later.
Incompetence against Smurfs (Su): Gargamel suffers -2 penalty in all his rolls against Smurfs. Smufs get a +2 bonus to saves against scrolls, spells and special abilities used by Gargamel. This is a result of his curse as a darklord, so it cannot be negated with an antimagic field or anything similar.
Smurf to gold (Sp): Gargamel can cast the spell Smurf to Gold (see the New Spells section) at will, at a caster level equal to his occultist level. Doing so consumes the normal casting time and spell components as the spell.
You’ll never kill me (Su): Smurfs are too goody-goody to harm Gargamel permanently. Any Smurf performing an action that could directly kill Gargamel (for example any Smurf performing a coup de grace against him) stops in its tracks and doesn’t do it. This is a mind-affecting, compulsion effect.

Lair
We’ve all seen this dilapidated tower at least once in their lives. If you are Smurf chances is that you’d be captured at least once in your life in Gargamel’s lab (or is it a kitchen?). You’ll recognize the orthogonal single-floor building with a narrow good-for-nothing tower, the big (big enough to accommodate for all 101+ smurfs) dirty cauldron and the fact that it’s full of cat hair.

Closing the Borders
Gargamel isn’t interested in keeping anyone near him – he is not a very social person. Of course, he doesn’t want Smurfs to escape his clutch either. That’s why he keeps his borders usually closed, but only regarding to Smurfs. Any Smurf trying to escape the domain finds itself overcome by an irresistible nostalgia for its village and turns back trying to return to the Smurf Village for 1 full hour. This is a mind-affecting, compulsion effect.

Well that's all I can think to add now. Let me know what you think.

[tec-goblin]

Sheesh! Man, the more you write, the more I remember! I'll add what I have to what you have.

That's why I post them - I am using your memory here

It was not just their forest but the ENTIRE WORLD they had to search,

I know, but this contradicts with the closed borders scenario.

The only thing I'd change here is that I wouldn't make it one Papa's books. Papa keeps books of learning or magic around. He would have no reason to keep a book of jokes.

Well, I made it that to fit with the scheme of "Papa may be a bit evil and have planted the book in purpose". I don't say it clear, but a DM who doesn't like Papa might think of it. It's one more dirty little secret

Um.. Was it going to be Cook or Greedy here?

Both, as he was in the TV show. Was him called Cook or Greedy there?

Later Handy created a female companion for for Clockwork Smurf, Clockwork Smurfette. To Handy, The clockworks are his children. he feels as a father toward both of them and will defend and nurture them accordingly.

Ok, that's interesting - probably I won't include clockwork smurfette, but the feelings towards the constructs are interesting



I will incorporate many of your comments to the text. Thanks!

[Manofevil]

Sheesh! Man, the more you write, the more I remember! I'll add what I have to what you have.

That's why I post them - I am using your memory here

It was not just their forest but the ENTIRE WORLD they had to search,

I know, but this contradicts with the closed borders scenario.

Hmm. I don't know. If Grandpa's confined to the forest while searching for the elements, it's hard to imagine the rest of the smurfs could not run into him for 500 years. Also the spell Homnibus cast to transport the smurfs was on a pair of boots. The Smurfs would hop in one of them and say 'Magic Boot, take us to that place' and off they'd fly in the boot. Gagamel, having overheard the smurfs discussing the Longlife stone as 'Our greatest treasure' stole the other boot and used it to follow the smurfs in hopes of lining his pockets. Hmm, I guess that shoots the whole thing in the ass right there, but still a flying boot could probably get over borders that weren't closed and the smurf forest borders aren't ALWAYS closed are they? Then again, we could always set the Longlife stone quest during the Requiem or the Grand Conjunction. It'd save us the trouble of having to come up with something for them later.

The only thing I'd change here is that I wouldn't make it one Papa's books. Papa keeps books of learning or magic around. He would have no reason to keep a book of jokes.

Well, I made it that to fit with the scheme of "Papa may be a bit evil and have planted the book in purpose". I don't say it clear, but a DM who doesn't like Papa might think of it. It's one more dirty little secret

Um.. Was it going to be Cook or Greedy here?

Both, as he was in the TV show. Was him called Cook or Greedy there?

It was Greedy there and he always loved eating more than cooking, but only just barely. He was always quick to do both and anyone who needed a meal could turn to Greedy for one.

Later Handy created a female companion for for Clockwork Smurf, Clockwork Smurfette. To Handy, The clockworks are his children. he feels as a father toward both of them and will defend and nurture them accordingly.

Ok, that's interesting - probably I won't include clockwork smurfette, but the feelings towards the constructs are interesting



I will incorporate many of your comments to the text. Thanks!

Also as far as Jokey's Surprises, as he calls them, are concerned, Jokey is not completely immune to them himself. When the smurfs were digging up the village looking for the LongLife stone, He dug up one of his forgotten old joke boxes and couldn't resist opening it. Also once when all the smurfs were sleepwalking, Jokey woke up with a present in hand and again couldn't resist opening it himself. A magical compulsion?
Also, I never described Nanny Smurf. She's an old gray haired granny type who wears a purple house frock, eyeglasses, and a pink shawl in addition to the standard white smurf hat. The only habits I remember her exhibiting were knitting, pinching cheeks, and correcting Grandpa on details when he's telling his stories.

[tec-goblin]

Hmm. I don't know. If Grandpa's confined to the forest while searching for the elements, it's hard to imagine the rest of the smurfs could not run into him for 500 years. Also the spell Homnibus cast to transport the smurfs was on a pair of boots. The Smurfs would hop in one of them and say 'Magic Boot, take us to that place' and off they'd fly in the boot. Gagamel, having overheard the smurfs discussing the Longlife stone as 'Our greatest treasure' stole the other boot and used it to follow the smurfs in hopes of lining his pockets. Hmm, I guess that shoots the whole thing in the ass right there, but still a flying boot could probably get over borders that weren't closed and the smurf forest borders aren't ALWAYS closed are they? Then again, we could always set the Longlife stone quest during the Requiem or the Grand Conjunction. It'd save us the trouble of having to come up with something for them later.

I also thought of it - I'll see what I'll do. Hey, Grandpa wasn't actually searching the world! It's only false history. But I suppose it would be sane to suspect that Grandpa get out (but not all Smurfs) during his travels. It smells of a dread possibility...

[Le Noir Faineant]

Hello Tec!

So can I suppose the article's complete? Then I#ll eventually print it and start painting!

[Le Noir Faineant]

Besides, the link above doesn't work...

[Manofevil]

I've decided to share some combat abilities I remember from the show for each smurf I can remember.

Jokey [UPDATED]
Male Smurf Smart Hero 1/Charismatic Hero 2: CR 3; SZ D(humanoid); HD 3d6; hp 10; Mas 11; Init +3; Spd 20ft; Defense 18, touch 18, flat-footed 15; Base Atk +1; Grapple -15; Atk +1 unarmed melee (1); SA suggestion 1/week (from path of corruption 1); SQ charm (males), red ribbon diet (from path of corruption 1) savant: craft (chemical), See everything in positive light; AL chaos, jokes, Smurfs; SV Fort +2, Ref +5, Will +4; AP 1; Rep+3; Str 2, Dex 16, Con 11, Int 13, Wis 13, Cha 16
Occupation: Creative (class skills: Forgery, Perform (dance, stand up))
Skills and Feats: Bluff +11*, Craft (chemical) +7, Demolitions +5, Diplomacy +10*, Forgery +3, Hide +19, Knowledge (behavioural sciences) +7, Move Silently +7, Perform (dance) +5*, Perform (singing) +5*, Perform (stand-up) +8*, Read/Write Language (Common, Smurf, Sylvan), Repair +4, Sense Motive +4, Speak Language (Common, Elven, Smurf, Sylvan); Stealthy, Iron Will, Run;
Jokey uses his Wealth +7 to creative explosives, including Jokey’s Hillarious Bombs .
*+2 against males. Jokey is used to make pranks against other Smurfs, but he hasn’t much experience in women (there is only one in the village after all).

Oh, who’s this lovely Smurf smurfing you a great smurf in a yellow box? He must be a formidable character indeed. You too eager to open the box…
BANG!

History
Jokey’s past seems a straight line of adventures, jokes and prank-made mayhem. There are secrets, though, no Smurf would expect: secrets regarding the events around his first creation of his signature bombs…
Jokey, as a smurfling smurfed, around with the other smurflings, making fun of Papa Smurf – Jokey was the only stain in Papa’s image of seriousness and knowledge. This went one step too far, when Jokey put a small bug in Papa’s pants, making him jumping around and screaming in a smurfishly funny way.
This was Jokey’s biggest exploit and he was thrilled by the experience. He wanted to test his limits. Then, all of a sudden, he fell on one of Papa’s books, with the magnificent title “The Big Book of Laughs”. This book was full of receipts for dangerous explosive solutions and ingenious pranks– wow, that would make a great show!
Jokey never stopped to think of the reason he found that book so easily – maybe our canny reader will be thinking of complicated plots and paranoid scenarios. The result was him smurfing his first bomb – a bomb he was too eager to test, despite the dangers involved.
And so he did – in one of his lone expeditions to the forest (he was old enough to get away with some sneaking outside of the village), he found a passing knight and gave him the first of the yellow boxes ever created by his hands. The knight thought it was some kind of magical fey gift and opened it…
Oh! That was a surprisingly huge explosion by Smurfish standards. Even a human knight couldn’t stand it without harm. That’s what Jokey thought – and, still blinded and deafened by the burst, he ran off to the village, leaving the injured knight alone in the forest – only the Mists know what happened to the Knight – because the Mists saw everything. And they were intrigued…
Jokey found himself being able to create bombs that could almost convince someone to open them. That was a frightening gift, he thought… He could injure more people with this – and he didn’t want such a thing. That’s why he smurfed on researching harmless bombs – Jokey’s Hillarious Bombs.

Current Sketch
The past is very far away… Jokey has been more careful since. The only thing that reminds him his past error is a nasty little habit he has – when alone, he has to eat one red ribbon each day or suffer from nausea for the rest of the day. No other Smurf has shown any sign of knowing his little secret.
And life smurfes on – Jokey is still messing around with other Smurfs – one of the best moments of his career was the resistance against the short period of Brainy’s dictatorship (it happened when Papa was away – smurf the relevant episode), when Brainy called him “anarchic” and ordered the rest of the Smurfs to hunt him. Sometimes he feels alone, though. Is he the only Smurf bored under Papa’s rule?

Combat
Jokey is not a combatant, but he can be very dangerous in the rare case he gets really annoyed with someone. A Smurf that can smurf into your home, deceive you and plant explosives that can stun you or even damage you (that’s very rare practice for Jokey) is a formidable foe indeed.
In straight combat, Jokey usually distracts the enemy to gain time for other Smurfs and then tries to hide.

Jokey's surprise boxes can be used in any capacity an explosive can and Jokey isn't beyond using them as such. He's used them to spook animals, blast away obstructions like boulders, and even once loaded one onto a human sized crossbow which the smurfs had adapted into a catapult to drive off a flying monster bird called th The Howley Bird. He never thought to use them in an ariel bombardment but he could easily.

Smurfette
Female Smurf Charismatic Hero 3: CR 3; SZ D(humanoid); HD 3d6; hp 10; Mas 10; Init +1; Spd 20ft; Defense 16, touch 16, flat-footed 15; Base Atk +1; Grapple -16; Atk +1 unarmed melee (1); SA favour; SQ charm (males), See everything in positive light; AL law, pleasure, Smurfs; SV Fort +2, Ref +3, Will +2; AP 1; Rep+3; Str 1, Dex 12, Con 10, Int 12, Wis 12, Cha 18
Occupation: Celebrity (class skill: Bluff)
Skills and Feats: Bluff +11*, Climb -3, Diplomacy +14*, Gather Information +6*, Hide +14, Knowledge (behavioural sciences) +3, Knowledge (popular culture) +4, Listen +3, Move Silently +4, Perform (dance) +7*, Perform (sex) +10*, Perform (singing) +7*, Read/Write Language (Common, Smurf, Sylvan), Sense Motive +3, Speak Language (Common, Elven, Smurf, Sylvan), Spot +3, Swim -3; Alertness, Athletic, Trustworthy;
Smurfette uses her Wealth +9 to buy copies of the same white dress.
*+3 against males.

Smurfette is the dream of every Smurf. She’s all the female element that Smurfs lack, overpacked in one single individual. Her coquettish manners, long blonde hair and mincing eyelashes have smurfed many a Smurf adventure.

History
Smurfette wasn’t always this usually good hearted creature that is the joy of the village. She was initially created by Gargamel as an alchemical creation, in one of his very few moments of apparent magic power. Her initial plan was to infiltrate the Smurf village and lead the Smurfs into a Gargamel’s ambush.
Of course, even this Gargamel’s plan was doomed to turn against him. Papa Smurf realized the truth about Smurfette and, instead of just harming her, he brought her good side to light. After all, he had centuries to see a female Smurf…
Current Sketch
Smurfette has integrated very well into the Smurfish society. The Smurfs love her the way only someone who has seen only one woman in his life could love her. She tries to make everyone happy, and really enjoys the process. After all, they are all so kind and helpful. She likes being necessary. And all Smurfs love being useful.

Combat
Smurfette does not fight. At all. She will charm her way out of dangerous situations. She has, though, the sense to organize other Smurfs and lead them to safety, but only when this is really needed. Otherwise, she prefers to see them make it through by their own efforts. In that way, they learn things. And they behave so knightly….

Smurfette hasn't any real combat skills but she's not without courage. When she sees someone in trouble, unless it's an enemy like Gargamel, she'll almost always intervene. Her intervention rarely extends beyond her rushing in and yelling 'You Stop That!!' and while that may work on most animals (she never shows fear), it's gotten her into trouble on more than one occasion

Lair
Smurfette has a nice small mushroom house which is distinguished by its nice small garden and the hanging washed dresses. It has nothing else really special. Except from a really comfortable bed.

Other Smurfs

BRAINY – smart 2
Allegiances: law, Papa Smurf, smartness

The only Smurf to take everything seriously. Brainy is a moraliser who believes everything Papa Smurf says is sacred. He has even filled a whole book with “clever words” and “morals” of Papa and himself.
He has smurfed to great lengths to insure that his vision of order is preserved among the Smurfs, but his efforts usually smurf up with him upside down. There was a time, though, that he managed to take control of the village in Papa’s absence. He still bears the hatred towards Jokey for spoiling him this small moment of victory over the chaotic and childish Smurfs….

Combat
Brainy's combat abilities are as limited as one might expect. He almost always panics when cornered and his cowardice is sickening to behold. especially when he takes credit for whatever action others took to get him out of that corner. However, on the rare occasion, he can show some savvy. Usually, it's when others beside himself are in danger and he's not. His savvy usually takes the form of quick thinking that's surprisingly effective. It's rare but it does happen.

COOK SMURF – strong 1/ smart 1
Allegiances: cooking, good, Smurfs

You can’t miss him with his tall white hat and apron. And his house is always the source of the delicious smell of hot bread, muffins, pies and sweets. Needles to say, he is a “cordon bleu”. He is among the most good-hearted and helpful Smurfs around, when not busy tasting his delicacies.

Greedy hates combat, mostly, because it's his favorite foods being used for ammunition. He finds this heartbreaking.

GROUCHY– dedicated 2
Allegiances: Baby Smurf, mumbling, Sassette

No matter what anyone says, Grouchy smurfs against it. He grumbles and mumbles and always thinks negative. What is hidden from most Smurfs, though, is that he has a tender heart and loves Sassette and Baby.

LAZY SMURF – charismatic 1
Allegiances: Sleep

Lazy only thinks of sleeping. When he painfully wakes in the morning, he waits for the evening to go back to sleep. He loves his pillow. Lazy’s laziness doesn’t bother the other Smurfs except Brainy who’s always after him, smurfing him each time he dozes off.
It is rumoured that his condition is a result of some sleep spell which went awry… Even if this is true, the origins of the spell are unknown…


HANDY– smart 3
Allegiances: Good, Smurfs, Technology

If anything ever needs fixing, Handy is the man for the job. He is also a creator. The pencil behind his ear is always being used to sketch things like a robot, a train or a machine to smurf rain. His creations sometimes exceed the Progress Level of the Village by far. No scholar knows his secret – he seems too good natured to have been helped by the Mists… Or not?

I don't remember Handy ever engaging in any sort of physical combat. His machinery, however, is very easily adapted when the village is besieged. I do remember once him having a precognitive dream about a huge lawn mower like machine called the smurfomatic smurfolator. He became obsessed with building it and it was lucky he did , because Gargamel had spread a magic weed seed that, with a single squirt of water, grew into a giant tree-sized weed in less than a second. The only thing that kept the forest from becoming one giant plant was Handy's mighty machine. This machine was never seen again. I have this image of a big cave somewhere near the village that filled with machines that handy doesn't use anymore. An Arsenal?

CLOCKWORK SMURF – strong 1/ smart 1 construct
Allegiances: Handy
Notable: construct traits, dread golem; CR 3; Defense 21; SQ regeneration 5 (fire, acid), spider climb; Str 6, Dex 14, Con -, Int 9, Wis 9, Cha 9;

Clockwork Smurf was smurfed and built by Handy to help him out with domestic work. He is useful to everyone and makes delicious sarsaparilla soup for the whole village. From time to time he leaves the Smurfs but comes back regularly to say hello to his friends and takes this opportunity to have his mechanical insides overhauled.
No Smurf, except from Handy, suspects that only dark powers could give that kind of intellect to Clockwork Smurf. His zeitgeist is the word “sarsaparilla” which makes him go to great lengths to cook some soup. It is unknown if there are other words that trigger other functions… Like smurfing people…

Clockwork's combat abilities are clear. He is perfectly capable of lifting and throwing a fully grown human a long distance.

HARMONY – charismatic 1
Allegiances: Music, Smurfs

Harmony has the soul of a great musician, but not the talent. He plays in the philharmonic smurfestra. But the only sounds that come from his cornet are Kwaaak and Pweeet. There is hidden animosity towards him by Smurfs when they want to nap. Or not so hidden sometimes, like in the case of Lazy Smurf.

Harmony has managed to develope some techniques with his horn that can be useful in combat. He spooks animals with it and has developed several different calls to be played on his horn for various occasions. One means 'Shut up'. One means 'Beware, danger coming' and another means 'Help, I'm in trouble'. The most famous is the bold but dissonant charge he blows as the smurfs charge into battle

HEFTY – strong 3
Allegiances: Fitness, Law, Smurfs
Notable: Atk club +9 (d2); Str 6, Dex 14, Con 15; Power Attack

Distinguished by a heart-shaped tattoo on his arm. Hefty is the strongest Smurf in the village. He is a sportsman and has even organised the Olympic Smurfs. One can always depend on him if there is any hard work to be done. His combat abilities make him perhaps the only Smurf who would prefer direct assault against an enemy. He is rarely capable to smurf of a more complicated plan, anyway.

Hefty has the most battle savvy of any of the smurfs. If He and other smurfs are cornered and Papa isn't there, It's always Hefty who leads the desparate stand.

PAINTER SMURF– smart 1/ charismatic 1
Allegiances: Good, Painting, Smurfette

Painter lives only for his craft. Canvas, brushes and colour are the joys of his life. Smurfette is his favourite model. But no normal paint can catch her beauty. Maybe some magical one?

Painter is also a speed demon with brush when under attack. On more than one occassion, he's managed to paint up a very realistic painting of himself on a wall which his attackers have mistaken for him and attacked.

POET SMURF – charismatic 1
Allegiances: Chaos, Poetry

With a quill in one hand and a parchment in the other, Poet spends his days scribbling prose, quatrains and essays. He daydreams so much he doesn’t realise the danger he gets himself into. His dedication to his art is unsurpassable; sometimes the words in his parchment seem to get a life of their own.

VANITY SMURF – charismatic 1
Allegiances: Beauty, Fashion, Smurfs

Mirror in hand, and with a flower in his bonnet, Vanity simply adores himself. He thinks he is the smurfiest Smurf in the village and loves talking fashion with Smurfette. Vanity like this always steers the attention of the Mists…

Vanity is a surprisingly good watchman in spite of his tendancy to distract himself. Many's the time he's gazed into his mirror, admiring himself in the setting behind only to spot an appoaching enemy and raise the alarm. He also has some ability as a marksman.

GRANDPA SMURF – tough 1/charismatic 2
Allegiances: Law, Smurfs, Travelling
Notable: Str 1, Dex 8, Con 8, Int 16, Wis 18, Cha 19;

Back in the village after a five hundred-year leave, Grandpa Smurf is the oldest of all Smurfs. He has not taken Papa’s leading role but his energy and enthusiasm are impressive. Besides wearing a bright yellow cap and pants, Grandpa always smurfs pince-nez glasses.
He’s an avid storyteller and loves to show off some of the souvenirs he has collected during his travels. These travels delve deep into false history, but a clever observant could fill in some pieces of the puzzle that the Smurf existence is.

WIthout a doubt, the most efective, most experienced, most impressive combatant in all the village is Grandpa Smurf. His ever present walking stick is as effective as any sword in combat and Grandpa is a formidable swordsmurf. He can handle any combatant his size and, given his surroundings, there are plenty of them. His Walking stick was originally a branch from a part of the forest called simply 'The Enchanted Forest'. While exploring this place once. Grandpa was attacked by it's guardian, The Tree Banshee. Grandpa fell from the upper boughs and grabbed this branch to keep from falling. The branch quickly broke but not before it broke enough of Grandpa's fall so that he wasn't injured when he fell and was able to make his escape. This branch has been his constant companion ever since. It' is very flexible and very strong.

Ahh . I'm tired. I'll do the rest later.

[Manofevil]

BABY SMURF – charismatic 1
Allegiances: Good, Innocence, Smurfs
Notable: (due to his young age) Str 1, Dex 13, Con 9, Int 8, Wis 10 Cha 15

On a blue, moonlit night, Baby Smurf was brought to the village by a stork. But where did he come from? No-one knows, but everyone immediately adopted him - even though he breaks the routine of their lives.
He is the only Smurf who was born outside false history. He was too young to remember the events, but some mind-probing could reveal the secrets of the origin of Smurfs.

Baby Smurf is surprisingly able to care for himself. He has some abilities as an enchanter which he presumably picked up by observing Papa Smurf in his lab. Not long after the smurflings came about, a small pup was foundin the forest and adopted by them. The pup, it turned out, was a charge of the smurfs enchanter friend, Homnibus. The Pup was, in rfact, made immortal by the magic locket around its neck supposedly containing the ultimate secrets of magic. It would only be opened by the one who was destined to open it. Everyone else who tried, including Papa Smurf, received a powerful electric shock. (Actually, lightning would strike them in the ass ) Homnibus recognized how attached the smurflings had become to the pup and passed the charge of it to Papa Smurf. After that, Puppy, as he was known, became a regular fixturte in the village. At the end of the episode, Baby Smurf crawled up to a snoozing Puppy and succeeded in opening and closing the locket. In following episodes, Wwhen the smurfs were in a jam and there was no way out (And no one was looking) Baby Smurf would wave his fingers and a magic spell would rescue them .

THE SMURFLINGS
SLOUCHY – tough 1
Allegiances: Apathy

Slouchy is not lazy. He just doesn’t care for anything. If he is asked to do anything, he will. But slowly. He plays mellow sax in the Smurfling band. A person like him would never smurf a nervous breakdown. The next time he reacts too slowly to help some Smurf in danger the Mists might not be so forgetful...

SNAPPY– strong 1
Allegiances: Chaos, Nerves

Snappy lives up to his name by being a ball of energy. He goes absolutely berserk when he doesn’t get his way. He is so impatient and bad-tempered that only Papa Smurf can calm him down.
What Snappy doesn’t know is that he has a strange condition, making his nerves tickle whenever he sees white clothing – that’s why only Papa can smurf him down. We don’t know if Papa suspects the reason of Snappy’s nerves…

Snappy is also known for recklessness. He once leaped from a tree to land on Gargamel's nose. He also doesn't think too far ahead before he opens his mouth and has managed to antagonize many more powerful enemies.

SASSETTE – smart 1/charismatic 1
Allegiances: Good, Knowledge, Smurfs

Sassette was created by the Smurflings to keep Smurfette company. She has red pigtails and pink overalls. She is a rough and tumble tomboy who is always asking “Why?” and “How?”. As you can imagine, Smurfette is obviously not really interested in Sassette, who, of course, doesn’t care… The world is so full of other smurfing things. Sassette’s curiosity can bring adventure to the village in a moment’s notice.

Nope I can't think of a single instance where Sassette engaged in combat

[Smeazel]

Clockwork's combat abilities are clear. He is perfectly capable of lifting and throwing a fully grown human a long distance.

Erm...if that's true, shouldn't he have a Strength of more than 6?

[Manofevil]

Hmm. I don't know. If Grandpa's confined to the forest while searching for the elements, it's hard to imagine the rest of the smurfs could not run into him for 500 years. Also the spell Homnibus cast to transport the smurfs was on a pair of boots. The Smurfs would hop in one of them and say 'Magic Boot, take us to that place' and off they'd fly in the boot. Gagamel, having overheard the smurfs discussing the Longlife stone as 'Our greatest treasure' stole the other boot and used it to follow the smurfs in hopes of lining his pockets. Hmm, I guess that shoots the whole thing in the ass right there, but still a flying boot could probably get over borders that weren't closed and the smurf forest borders aren't ALWAYS closed are they? Then again, we could always set the Longlife stone quest during the Requiem or the Grand Conjunction. It'd save us the trouble of having to come up with something for them later.

I also thought of it - I'll see what I'll do. Hey, Grandpa wasn't actually searching the world! It's only false history. But I suppose it would be sane to suspect that Grandpa get out (but not all Smurfs) during his travels. It smells of a dread possibility...

If you're going to do this and cling to the episode, the smurfs need to visit first an arctic domain, like Vorostokov or something, for the element water, Har'Akir or Sebua for earth, One of the oriental domains for wind, and a volcanic tiki type island for fire.

So Is it done yet or what?

[tec-goblin]

Well well, sorry for the delay, but I had a lot of great work to do. Except from meeting people, playing Silent Hill 4 and preparing for the next year in France, I playtested with a lot of people the Smurfs, wrote many new parts, found a person who wrote the Introduction (Atrelegis, the happy lovely puppy) and I am ready to post new material.

Well, for start, the playtesting was LOVELY - the players want more. I don't have the time - I was tired of too much laughing (actually to tears) in the first 2 hours, but the next 2 were great too. We had a power-monger Brainy, who plotted continuously, a Smurfette who was reallly a sl**, a Vanity who died when turned to a werewolf and saw all these ugly hair on his face (actually, he died because he failed his horror save, got into rage and Brainy threw him out of the airship), paths of corruption and many many more funny things.

The forest is ready, Desdichado you can start the map. The intro is ready, a new monster (the idea came to Atrelegis in the session - Smurf Swarm) is also ready, the intro is there and many corrections were put in place. I changed some stats after seeing the last posts, but I try to keep some measure of play balance and rules combatibility here, so, clockwork smurf won't have Strength 16... (If he had, he could fend of Gargamel almost by himself... Where's the point of fearing Gargamel then?). So, not EVERY thing that happened in the series will be possible, but the world will have much staying power and many hooks for great adventures.

I include in the next post the most significant articles - particularly the completely new parts. Contact me through pm if you want me to send you the draft of the article. It has a lot of sidebars, so it is better to see the document by itself.

[tec-goblin]

The Smurfland
Dirty Little Secrets
Writing: tec-goblin
Additional writing: Atrelegis, Manofevil
Editors: tec-goblin
Playtesters: Atrelegis, Dimi, Lumenintervalum, Luthien, Sugar, tec-goblin, Viky
Thanks to: Cure, Desdichado, Igor the Henchman, Rikochet, www.smurf.com


Out of the Blue 1
History 2
Smurfs in General 4
Appearance 4
Language 4
Lifestyle & Education 5
The Smurf Hero 5
The Land 6
DM’s Appendix 7
Involving the Players 7
New Equipment 8
New Monster 9
New Spells 10
Who’s Smurfed 10
Papa Smurf 10
Jokey 12
Smurfette 14
Other Smurfs 15
Gargamel & Azrael 18
Out of the Blue
Dear Mother,

You’ll have to excuse me for my poor handwriting, since my claws still hurt from the last hunt, which, as usual, went to the proverbial ‘dogs’ (excuse me for the expression).
Besides that, life as a familiar isn’t all that bad, even when you belong to a goofy, good-for-nothing wizard like my employer. I tell you, mother, this man can’t even tell his spell component from one another! Last night, he almost blew his face to a pulp. Good thing that it wasn’t lethal…
Food is sparse in general, but we always get along. Yeah, I know, it’s not like Azalin’s halls and I may not be as well-fed as my sister, but there’s never a boring day out here, you know…there’s always hunt and play and there’s always my lord to mess around with. The weather’s foggy like always out here, near the castle and I tell you mother, sometimes I can hear the powers conversing right out of the windows!
But he can’t hear them, nor can those little blue things…or so I hope.
Oh mother, the blue things! The unspeakable, terrible, insane things! They dwell in the forest, lost from our eyes and their songs drive me crazy! I hear them, after the storms, in sunny days, in snowy days, even in the middle of storms; I hear their songs and that strange lament of the trumpet that only their musician could produce, howling like the sounds of thrice-damned souls.
They dwell there and I cannot see them. I hunt them, but they get away. Where there is darkness, they dwell as if it were the coziest abode! The Mists speak of them often, like the brown-folk do, but they speak in hushed tones, as if they are intrigued by them! The Mists mother, intrigued by the blue midgets! What is it so special about them, but the red-clad one?
He comes, mother, into the night. I have seen him; he creeps in the shadows and whispers things in my master’s ears. And once he wakes, there is nothing in his mind but his crazy schemes! He doesn’t hear me, mother, his own familiar’s voice is somehow shrouded from him! My advices go unheeded, the riches in a soul thus corrupt left unplundered!
Tell the master of this, mother and inform him of the Blue Things. Tell him about them, so that he may guide me too. For I sense a great evil brewing in this forest and it is spreading. Unless the darklord falls into our direct control, our interests in the area shall be greatly compromised!

Thyne offspring,
Azrael

[..]
The Land
Judging from the local legends, the Smurf forest is in Tepest or probably somewhere in the forests of South or Eastern Darkon. There are tales on “blue fey” in Tepest and “white-capped demons” in the villages south of Nartok. The exact position, though, is impossible to pinpoint – strange magic hides the location of the Smurf village. Even travellers once called to the village seem incapable to find it again, as if it has moved to another forest. And it may – because Smurf Village never has very hard winters – so it’s possible that it relocates in winter.
There are descriptions of the features of this land, though. Even in this small heavy forested area there is some variation: for start, the river Smurf passes through the domain – it isn’t something much bigger than a fast stream, but Smurfs needed to build a dam and a bridge on it, which they carefully maintain. The river apparently has so many branches to it that it's not practical to follow the river upstream to the village (which is anyway protected by a spell which conceals its nature).
At the centre of the forest, not far away from the Smurf village is the Great Oak, by which the Smurfs especially like to walk and play. Gargamel uses the spot a lot as a setting for his Smurf-traps. Just west of the forest lies the home of Homnibus, the mage, a big friend to Papa Smurf.
Looking to the other side of the domain, in the far east, there is something that resembles a beach coastline, for Smurf standards. It’s probably just a lake, but anyway, it is enough for the Smurfs to go swimming en masse during hot summer days.
The north border of the domain is set by a range of high step hills – actually not high enough to be a tall mountain, but still a great obstacle by Smurfish standards. There lies the home of Father Time and Castle Captor, the Nanny’s Smurf prison. This is a giant talking and moving but fixed edifice that would capture travellers and force them to clean and repair it until they dropped from exhaustion. Travellers approach this place and when they are close enough, huge brick arms reach out and toss them through the front gate, trapping them. Their only possible escape is waiting and working for 500 years (for some strange reason they are kept alive all this time) for the castle to appear again and hope to get past the castle many snares to the outside.
Anyway, the forest is full of life, not just moving rocks. A traveller will inevitably meet animals and other, much more dangerous and wondrous creatures. For example, the Smurfs have a long list of Fey among their non-human friends. They often intercede on behalf of one-another.

Local Animals and Native Horrors
Wildlife: CR 1/10 – bat; toad; CR 1/6 – lizard; raven; CR 1/4 – owl; pony; weasel; CR 1/3 – dog; hawk; snake, Tiny viper; CR ½ – badger; eagle; snake, Small viper; CR 1 – mule; CR 2 – boar; CR 4 – bear, brown;
Monsters: CR 1/2 – merfolk, 1st level warrior (other merfolks exist);CR 1 – fungus, shrieker; sprite, nixie; sprite, grig; CR 2 – crawling ivy*; CR 3 – assassin vine; fungus, violet; ogre, unicorn, werewolf smurf (weresmurf); CR 4 – owlbear; CR 5 – arak, shee*; arak, sith*; green hag, pixie, with irresistible dance; CR 6 – tendriculos, troll, dread*; CR 7 – nymph; CR 8 – treant, dread*;

Most of the creatures above rarely attack Smurfs. There are also rumours that the mythical Tarrasque visits the Forest once on the summer solstice.

[..]
New Monster
SMURF SWARM
Diminutive Humanoid (Swarm)
Hit Dice: 12d8 (54 hp)
Initiative: +1
Speed: 20 ft. (4 squares)
Armor Class: 15(+4 size, +1Dex), touch 15 flat-footed 14
Base Attack/Grapple: +9/—
Attack: Swarm (2d6)
Full Attack: Swarm (2d6)
Space/Reach: 5 ft./0 ft.
Special Attacks: Distraction
Special Qualities: Half damage from weapons, see everything in positive light, special swarm traits
Saves: Fort +4, Ref +9, Will +4
Abilities: Str 1, Dex 12, Con 10, Int 11, Wis 11, Cha 12
Skills: Diplomacy +7, Hide +4, Listen +4, Move Silently +4, Perform (dance) +4, Perform (sing) +4, Spot +2
Feats: Weapon FinesseB
Environment: Smurf land (temperate forest)
Organization: Solitary
Challenge Rating: 4
Treasure: Standard
Allegiances: Usually Good, Smurfs
Advancement: None
Level Adjustment: —
Combat
A smurf swarm seeks to avoid combat, probably by being sooo cute. But when in danger, it can be a dangerous foe. A smurf swarm deals 2d6 points of damage to any creature whose space it occupies at the end of its move.
Distraction (Ex): Any living creature that begins its turn with a smurf swarm in its space must succeed on a DC 16 Fortitude save or be nauseated for 1 round. The save DC is Constitution-based.
Special swarm Traits (Ex); Smurf swarm is more sparse than a normal swarm. It consists of 100 Smurfs and occupies a single 5ft square. It is not immune to weapon damage, as other swarms of diminutive creatures are, but it takes half damage from weapons. It takes full damage from lit torches and energy damage of weapons, as written in Monster Manual™. It keeps all other swarm traits.

[tec-goblin]

Any comments? The article is almost ready, so any feedback has to come quite soon. Then I'll contact the FoS team to try get it into the next QtR

[Le Noir Faineant]

Any comments? The article is almost ready, so any feedback has to come quite soon. Then I'll contact the FoS team to try get it into the next QtR

Next QtR will be out on October 31!!! I am terrbly sorry tec, but I wont have my map ready until the last call for submissions! I am goign to Scotland for two weeks, and won't have any time to work it for a while. I won't have it ready before mid-November, really!