The Desolation of Zeidenburg, Part One

alhoon · Post by **alhoon** » Thu Apr 06, 2006 7:08 pm

Let me see...
Candle-nuke? Nope.
Soup of Marshmellows? Nope
Cole's flute?

How did that got here?
Ahhh... Here it is:

The Bathtube of Nightmares!. See how your duck handles this. It will probably jump in to be lost for all eternity!

Le Noir Faineant · Post by **Le Noir Faineant** » Fri Apr 07, 2006 12:10 pm

A bathtube that doesn't know how to behave?!

Well, then there's just one man who can handle that job:

It's him, MARIO!

Le Noir Faineant · Post by **Le Noir Faineant** » Fri Apr 07, 2006 12:10 pm

Now, this is a big one!

alhoon · Post by **alhoon** » Tue Apr 11, 2006 2:13 pm

Hey... I need clairvoyance to watch your Mario from Head to toe!

OK then. I'll let levitating gold pieces high above his head. His rythmic up-and-down jumps he will make to get them will cause a tremendous earthquake that will probably destroy him, the bathtube and the duck.

Le Noir Faineant · Post by **Le Noir Faineant** » Tue Apr 11, 2006 6:13 pm

I cast *disguise gnome* and Merowech the Mean changes into:

This should keep Mario from jumping for gold for a while... And now, princess Merowech orders Mario to bring her the alhoon's longest tentacle!!!

alhoon · Post by **alhoon** » Wed Apr 12, 2006 10:45 am

Time for an Evard's black tentacle spell, attached on napalm bomb trigger.

Let's see if he would like that BOOM the pulling of tentacles would cause.

Oh, and since Merowech choose that path, I can finally use my "Travestine repulsion ray" at last! It is a ray that shoots any man/woman crossdresser 500' away in an arc. I hope Merowech has parachutes on him or he will crush unceremoniously from a 250-300' tall fall.

Strange. I was sure I would use this on Charlatan first.

Le Noir Faineant · Post by **Le Noir Faineant** » Thu Apr 13, 2006 7:43 am

I answer with the summoning of the mushroom of doom!!!

Your laughable ray won't get me out of my skirt!

alhoon · Post by **alhoon** » Fri Apr 14, 2006 6:44 pm

I need this for my army.

Let's see how loyal it is. I'll send it 100 goblin bankers of my Nostalgian bank as an offering. It can kill them for sport, eat them as food or bargain with them. In every case, I'll probable make it switch sides

Le Noir Faineant · Post by **Le Noir Faineant** » Sat Apr 15, 2006 9:06 am

Gaah! I need more trustworthy servants!

I need a rider... And a knight... Well, a knight rider!!!

HE won't disappoint me! I know it!

Just look at them! David and his friends are going TO EAT YOUR HEART, brain-chewer!

alhoon · Post by **alhoon** » Sat Apr 15, 2006 4:46 pm

Hmmm. Let's see how they will fare against 100 Gremshikas.
This will do two goods:
1. They will probably show their powers.
2. THey will probably kill 100 Gremshikas violently!

This wagon without horses seems interesting. Although the light in the front is annoying.

Le Noir Faineant · Post by **Le Noir Faineant** » Mon Apr 17, 2006 7:17 am

David casts *Charm* on the Gremishkas.

Can they resist this?

alhoon · Post by **alhoon** » Mon Apr 17, 2006 6:45 pm

Apparently the could not. A pity and I wished to see them all dispatched violently to a bloody end. Oh, well never mind. He seems a disgustingly nice guy. Let's see how he reacts to a lady in distress situation:

This lady is threatened. Lonelyness (and a dozen Gremshikas) torment her to no end. SHe needs a "knight" to save her.

You know what I mean... Is he up to the task, or he will run away once she'll try to hug and kiss her hero?

Le Noir Faineant · Post by **Le Noir Faineant** » Tue Apr 18, 2006 3:51 am

David kisses her...

alhoon · Post by **alhoon** » Tue Apr 18, 2006 8:38 am

BLEAHHHH ! ! !

For everything that's unholy and evil! How could ... She is... It is impossible...

Oh crap! I'm thankful again that I'm undead or I would throw up! And what a waste of Dwarven brains that would be...

OK. The man obviously has guts. And Willpower. And no taste. So charms, fear effects and poison wouldn't affect him.

Hey! Is he undead? Did I find the secret behind this Gremshika charmer? Let's cast a control undead to see...

Le Noir Faineant · Post by **Le Noir Faineant** » Wed Apr 19, 2006 4:12 am

...

David casts *irresistible charm* on the alhoon...

Café de Nuit

Welcome, friends, to our establishment.

The Desolation of Zeidenburg, Part One