Tsayvetodd

Once, Tsayvetodd was a vain and petulant nobleman.

Then a foolish vampire made him into a vampire, too.

When Tsayvetodd took a bride, he slew her when he realized that she was more beautiful than him.

He sought the aid of a necromancer to make him even more beautiful, but the necromancer took her own life rather than face her patient's wrath over her failure.

So, now, Tsayvetodd surrounds himself with honey-tongued minions who work to sooth their master's battered ego.

- Stanton Fink, Excerpts from the Register, Undead Sea Scrolls 2003